The drunker I get, the more I forget the best thing around is the feel of the ground. It’s cool on my face.

Sobriety is a mother of a drug, sitting alone and hoping there’ll soon be someone to hug. A kiss would be nice, but I’ll piss on some ice for that frost-brewed taste in a mug.

Oh, times can be tough. They can. And times can be rough on your hands and knees. That’s because times like these rewind and repeat...

Hello's a good lie...